Another Pleasant Valley Sunday

2 Feb

Sunday 2nd February 2014

Nottingham Forest         3.1          Yeovil Town

(Paterson, Cox, Djebbour)                   (Moore)                              

What day is it again? I’m a bit confused, a bit out of synch, a bit like an elderly relative expressing the notion that those days between Christmas and New year’s just merge into one and that, ‘I don’t really know if I’m coming or going’.  I know how they feel.

Poor Dan Harding doesn’t seem to know if he’s coming or going after seeing Danny Fox signed from Southampton to dislodge him from the first team…again. I feel a bit bad for Dandy Dan and his Bambi legs as he’s come on leaps and Bambi bounds recently but didn’t Danny look foxy? Like a wily old fox with a cunning plan and bags of energy to boot (or burn, lots of people have pace to burn these days: maybe we should burn their pace instead of fossil fuels. Just a passing tangential thought. That’s all) And Jamie Mackie seems to be coming and going a lot recently too: he came on for the 2nd half against Watford, bagged a goal, ran around a bit, even more than usual, and although he started today, he ran off towards the end. But there’s more to Mackie’s game than running around a lot: he also looks exceptionally like everyone’s favourite Mathgeekthiefhardmanspy Matt Damon. And that’s a good thing…we need more Matt Damon lookalikes in this world. What if we run out of Matt Damons? That would be a bad thing.

Stand up if you love Fawaz. Stand up if you hate Derby. Sit down if you are a Forest fan standing in the Upper Bridgeford otherwise you will be asked to leave since you are patently obstructing someone else’s view and not utilising the moulded plastic for which you have paid through the nose. Stand up. Sit down. I’ll sit. Getting a bit old for all this standing and sitting. I might just write a carefully worded letter to Fawaz expressing my gratitude for spending shedloads of money on players. Probably best to write a strongly worded letter to Derby informing them of my attitude towards their football club and its state of affairs too. On second thoughts, it’s probably best to just tweet it. Or Facebook it. Or Snapchat. MSN? Does anyone use MSN anymore? Did anyone over 15 years old ever use it? I bet Jamie Paterson did. He certainly looks young enough with his boyish good boyband looks. I bet Reidy uses a typewriter though. A cultured one mind, while sipping absinthe and mourning the fin-de-siècle. He’s that classy.

That first 10 minutes though…how good were we? The answer is very good. Obviously. A goal too. I’m giving it to young Jamie as he might get someone from home to phone in if he doesn’t get it registering their displeasure regarding such a state of affairs. Better head that one off at the pass. Done. Jamie; it’s yours. It was going in anyway. And then those pesky Glovers went and did what they usually do: make us all go quiet and visit our own dark place, the chasms in our minds where we prefer not to dwell for too long. They’re good at that. They even channelled the spirit of Aaron Davies at one stage. That wasn’t nice. Not nice at all. Good job we scored again. That Simon Cox, eh? Runs the channels, works hard, holds the ball up and they’ve recently brought out a new model which scores goals too. Awesome.

Djebbour came on. He ran around, he was game. Churlish to point out that he hardly touched it when he scored a goal. A goal I could have scored. A goal my 8 year old daughter could have scored. A goal Darren Bent could have scored. No. Let’s not get silly now. Reign it in.

So two home games and two home wins. On paper we should have got them anyway so it never really mattered whether we did or not because contrary to popular opinion, football is played on paper, not grass. There’s a thin layer of paper underneath the pitch, soaking up moisture like a layer of old newspaper underneath the shavings in a guinea pig hutch. Maybe. Either way – EASY EASY EASY. We are going up etc……..All we’ve got to do is beat Leicester, beat Derby away (coz we ALWAYS do that don’t we?), beat Burnley and QPR away and loads of other teams too. Which we will. There you go; a rare moment of chest beating optimism. Enjoy it.

When’s the next game again?


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